Missing Radish–

Missing 11-day-old radish, Rexford the Radish, was last spotted on the Journalism Lab door on Monday, said members of The Pioneer Press.  

“I can’t believe it. I’m shocked,” staff writer and business manager Nicole Mendez said through tears.

No one ever thought such a heart-wrenching event could take place in this safe community of Jonathan Alder Local High School.

“Hate crimes have been taken to a whole new level,” exclaimed tech editor Chaz Phinney in a fury.

“I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. But I have a very particular lack of skills. I will never be able to find you. But what I do have is $2 and Cassio wrist-watch. You can have one of them” cries a source who would like to remain unnamed.*

“As of now we have our suspects but no evidence to support,” stated Chief Editor Gavin Frick. “We should conclude by tomorrow.”

The Pioneer Press is heartbroken in the search for this young, beloved, team member. The Pioneer Press will reward anyone who returns the beloved vegetable with an immense amount of gratitude, maybe a smile or two, and a magnet (or fifteen).

If you see or know anyone who has seen Rexford, please don’t hesitate to email [email protected]!

*Quote from Peter Griffin